So I’m sure you all have heard by now that NBC is trying to mess with The Tonight Show’s timeslot. Conan may not be hosting the show much longer, and as a goof, he’s posted the show onto Craigslist.
What you may not know is, I’m making him an offer.
Hey Conan and Andy (and hey, why not Max and the band too?),
More after the break
I’ll take that musty old talk show off of your hands. In exchange, you can join us! Have you guys considered a life of nerdy altruism? The Speed Gamers are a gaggle of geeks who play video game marathons as a live show for charity, where 100% of the donations go directly to the chosen charity and none to the gamers themselves. Come play with us in one of our marathons! You can die 600 times in Super Mario Brothers and everyone will be cool with it! And it’s all in the name of some great causes. And hey, if our schedule says you’re on at 11:35, then you’re on at 11:35! If Leno wants to lose at Super Mario Bros. then he can do it on his own time.
C’mon buddy! We’re not so different, you know. We’re pale and goofy and occasionally talk in a nasally dweeb voice! We stay up late! We do In The Year 3000 jokes! Plus last summer, the marathon to support ACT Today got 20,000 viewers! That’s 1,000 times the viewers NBC usually gets!
So give The Speed Gamers a shot. We all know Andy and Max play Pokémon anyway, so you might as well go for it.