OILD Day 7 – The Icy Ocean

Day 7 and getting closer to the 10th and final post! But before that, we need to give shout-outs to that adorable birdie that shows up in almost all ice levels ever; the penguin! Penguins really are the cutest things ever, don’t you think? They’re just so cuddly and sweet and squishy. That’s why today’s ice level is the Icy Ocean, from Yume Penguin Monogatari.

ice-yume-penguinYume Penguin Monogatari is a very weird little game. You play as Penta, a little blue dot-eyed penguin. His girlfriend, Penko the pink penguin, gets pretty upset with him one day on account of him being a ginormous tubby-tub-tub of penguin flub, and dumps him. Which from an evolutionary standpoint seems a bit strange since you’d think penguins would consider such a trait to be a great asset for surviving the harsh snowy climates they live in, but that’s hardly the oddest thing in this game. Penko’s new boyfriend is Ginji, the cool tough guy penguin who like all cool tough guys, is wearing a neon pink top hat and sunglasses at all times. Ginji learns that Penta wants to win Penko back, and thus orders ninja penguins to throw apples into Penta’s mouth so he remains a tubby-tub-tub. Penta has to slim down via diet drinks that just kind of appear out of nowhere, and has to beat up pirates, giant birthday cake clouds, and of course, a huge bird that splits into three hopping one-legged Muppets. Oh, and occasionally fly an airplane through pyramids and battle flying pigs. Yeah, Penko’s dissatisfaction with Penta really isn’t the weirdest thing in this game. If Penta doesn’t meet his target weight at the end of each stage, you have to start the stage all over. Each body type does give him different powers though, so that’s… no, that’s still incredibly weird.

Despite being a story all about penguins, the ice level is very short and only shows up at the very end of the game. See, despite Ginji being Penko’s new main squeeze, at the end of the game he just kidnaps her anyway for no real reason other than he’s a huge jerk. Of course Penta’s got to go save her! And that means running through the ice level. There are only a few enemies in this stage; fish that leap out of the water but are otherwise inedible despite Penta being a penguin, adorable seals that cheerfully lob apples straight towards Penta’s gaping maw, and polar bears that carry diet drinks on their backs. Oh, and the ocean. See, the weird rules of the game mean that you don’t have an actual health bar or lives, just a meter for Penta’s target weight. So if you fall into the ocean then you don’t die or get hurt, but rather Penta just sort of… drinks the entire ocean I guess?????… and jumps back out as a tubby-tub-tub.  After a short trip through the stage, Penta leaps into his airplane and fights Ginji in his huge cartoony robot plane, complete with big gloved hands that, of course, throw food. Because even if you save Penko, you still have to hit that target weight or it won’t count. What is going on in this video game??

oild-icy-ocean-tCUTENESS, THAT’S WHAT’S GOING ON. Get the full wallpaper here.

And here’s some music! This is the theme that plays during this stage, and it’s pretty rocking, though you won’t get to hear it much before you reach the final boss.

As you’ve probably guessed, there aren’t any remixes of that theme, unfortunately. So let’s get some different penguin songs! Braincooler is a remix of Chill Penguin’s stage from Mega Man X, and it’s by Rozovian. Braving the Storm is another Chill Penguin mix by Metal Man (no, not our Metalman)! Sense, Plan, and Act is by Sir_NutS. This mix is by warinside, this one is by Azell, and this one is by duffy123123 and Max Hamburgers.

Getting close to the end! Maybe you’ve figured out what the last ice levels will be. Or maybe not! But hopefully everyone can put their heads together and figure out how to make 2017 a nice year for everyone.

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